Monthly Archives: January 2012

Apprehensive about announcing I’m on the road to recovery

I woke up this morning before my alarm.  It makes sense, as I was in bed asleep shortly after 7:30 last night.  I enjoyed 11 solid hours of sleep without the help of Nyquil. I slept free style last night.

Sprung out of bed and took my vitamin stack, a multi vitamin, garlic & oil of oregano, beta keratin, vitamin c, and an immune probiotic.  You have to eat after taking oil of oregano, otherwise you burb up that flavor all day!

I made enough shake for two, I brought some to work for my coworker.  Pineapple tidbits, packed in juice, lemon Greek yogurt, Goji berries, 1 tsp each chia seeds flax seeds and hemp hearts, a splash of almond milk and a few ice cubes.  The result a whole grain, antioxidant and omega, vitamin C & A packed shake.  Delicious!  After a hot shower (same as a regular shower, but with ME in it…hahaha) I managed to clear my sinuses and run a saline netipot through.  Whoo hooo.

Of course thru the day, the pressure is back and I have a nasty sinus headache, but it was better for a while!!  The upside of being sick, this fever… I read somewhere you burn more calories when you are hot?  Is that right?  I’m going with it.

I feel thinner, not a lot, but pants fit a little looser.  Obviously being sick I haven’t been dedicated to exercise.  And I’m still not counting calories.  I hate the idea of it, so I will resist until it becomes necessary, then I will re-evaluate.  Not sure why I hate the idea of it so much, I think because I am afraid it would become very rigid for me.  I would be likely to take it too far! (Psycho….)

Body By Vi is a 90-day program, but I have set a 7-month goal for the 50 lbs.  I want to be realistic, and with any weight loss program, if it doesn’t become a lifestyle change you will end up right back where you started.

I have a dentist appointment in an hour.  I’m having my new tooth installed (crown on a tooth I broke a month ago), Dental work is so expensive, I’m thinking of it as an investment in myself, although the thought of spending a week on a beach somewhere instead of buying a new tooth had crossed my mind.  I mean… It’s a back tooth…do I really need all of them??  Yes, I do.  I should have all my teeth, for now.  Another thing I may re-evaluate.   Maybe the hot lab partner I find will have dental benefits including major restorative.  I know, I’m a hopeless romantic…

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NyQuil…making any surface look comfortable…

I am prone to sinus colds, and strep throat. At least once a year I get a good one. A knock me on my ass, in bed for 3 days kinda sick. As a teenager and into my 20’s I would just keep going, working, going out and I would stay sick all winter. My poor brother would have to hear my coughing/gagging up phlegm blowing my nose etc. as his room was right beside my bathroom. I should have had shares in sudafed, I always had it with me. The lymph nodes in my neck and my tonsils would be so swollen it would make my current back up chin look shamefully small.

Now I am huge baby. As soon as I start getting sick, it’s rest, vitamins, and every natural remedy you can think of. Oil of oregano, garlic, immune probiotics, rose hip tea, vitamin C, echinacea, ginger, honey, goji berries, oranges, quince, sterisol mouthwash gargles, neti pot full of saline, and silver hydrocortisol. I sniffle and moan. I feel sorry for myself. But I rest, and I usually get better quickly. I have developed an immunity to the most common antibiotics used to treat step and sinuses, so the stuff they have to prescribe is nasty. I could go into details, but most women know what I’m taking about here, plus the side effects of the pills themselves.

I try to go the natural route. Daytime cold medication spaces me right out, so I rarely take them. But I have NO shame taking NyQuil, it does just what it’s supposed to. It puts me in a coma for 10-12 hours. Such a deep sleep, that when I wake up I feel hungover, and foggy for the first hour I’m up. There is NO waking me before the 10 hours is up.

This may be purely physiological, but it may not. Last winter I was sick, and my Ex was going out for the night, usually he would sleep off his shooters in the spare room, and that was the plan as I was in the middle of the 3 days I spend sick in bed. There was an apartment fire in the building across the complex from us. It burnt most of the top floor of the building. They shut down the highway and every firefighter in town was on the scene. My ex said when he was home he didn’t get much sleep between the lights and sirens. I slept through all of this. I woke up at 9 am. Only because Vanessa called me. Sounding worried, she asked if I was OK, and needed a place to stay. I was foggy, and had no idea what she was talking about. Eyes still closed I asked Why? I guess it was unclear which building had been damaged, and she said, “your apartment building was on fire!” At this point I open my eyes, my ceiling looks normal, and I say “no one came and got me…” I think I’m ok? I roll out of bed and look out the window, the corner of the building with the most damage is about 200 feet away in direct view of my bedroom window. Nope, my building is fine, I explain the NyQuil comma, and promise to call her later. I need a drink of water for my “hangover”…

That is where I have been the last couple days, I don’t have the time to take days off work, So I’ve been loading up on hippie remedies, and spending 12 hours in a fog of green liquid. Still having a shake for breakfast, and one for lunch, (2 SCOOPS!) Using orange juice, pineapple and goji berries. And drinking Tea like it’s going out of style! No exercise, my head feels like it’s going to explode, I better go netipot and have some tea before bed!

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Thanks to my Brother Gary for sending me this picture! It’s perfect… I was still in a haze and gave the credit to my sister in law April. I love you both!

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Ughhhhh…

I have to say, 2 scoops and a little Greek yogurt really make the shakes stick! I am snacking less. Unfortunately I also skillfully acquired an AWESOME head cold. Dinner is a spinach salad, chicken breast and tzatziki, 2 big cups of herb tea, goji berry ginger and echinacea and 2 NyQuil. Usually puts me into a coma. Stupid head cold! Goodnight all!

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Hump day

I woke up with a sore throat. I have averted illness so far this year, I guess it’s about time…
Deep breath in, eyes closed, I gingerly stepped on the scale. 192.8
So despite self sabotage, a melt down and incorrectly making my shakes for 2 weeks, I lost a little over a pound. Victory!! (as my voice cracks and wavers… Stupid sore throat)

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Really Holley?? Really…

I was reading thru shake recipes tonight. Along with my shake mix I got only the chocolate and strawberry flavor mixes, is that normal? I also noticed all the concoctions called for 2 scoops of shake mix. I have only been putting in one. Yep. Just one. No wonder I’ve felt so hungry, felt like I was failing because I needed to snack all day. Makes more sense now. My shake is pre-made for morning. Coffee yogurt and peanut butter, with cappuccino soy milk and 2 scoops of shake mix. Maybe I’ll fare better!

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Not looking forward to tomorrow

Weigh in day, but between my meltdown and the weeks events it has been a real struggle.  I know this is a marathon not a sprint, I have just encountered my first hill, and my shoelace came untied.  Emotional week.

I will celebrate todays success… made a Vi shake with greek yogurt, and it really stuck with me.  Quinoa with cinnamon cranberries and a splash of milk for lunch, turkey pepperoni and cheddar for a snack, celery and PB while I made dinner, and leftover greek pepper for dinner.

I’m going to ride for just a half hour today, my calfs are tight!  I washed my yoga mat, so I can practice tomorrow!  Also on the agenda HOUSE CLEANING!  Yay…I am baking chicken breasts in Adobo seasoning to eat with salads for the rest of the week, also washing and portioning fruits and veggies.  It’s snowing like CRAZY, so I could go shovel, but there’s just an awful wind.  Plus I’ve started 8 jobs, I need to get some of this done.

Good or bad I’ll post my weigh in tomorrow morning

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Another monday

Woke up this morning, had a mango juice shake. Made some cinnamon cranberry quinoa in the rice cooker. It was a great change from steel cut oats. Banana milk with shake mix for late afternoon. I made the mistake of grocery shopping hungry, I now have an excessive amount of food.
Made a great dinner…

Stuffed greek peppers

3 large peppers, washed, tops cut off, seeds scooped out

1 cup boneless skinless chicken breast, roasted and shredded

1 cup cooked brown rice

1 cup chopped spinach

1/2 cup feta cheese

1 tablespoon of greek seasoning, or garlic minced

1 medium diced tomato (you can add onions, olives or more peppers if you would like)

2 eggs

Combine and mix all ingredients and stuff the peppers with the mixture. grate a little cheddar on the top, and bake 45 min 350F  Serve with a tablespoon of tzatziki. So delicious!!

 

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I am really full now.  But I’m going to wiggle my way into my sexy bike shorts and bike for 30 min.  Then I really should clean my house, but it’ll still be messy tomorrow…

Rough Couple of Days.

I’m so sorry I have neglected you.  I was having a crisis, and while writing helps I was having a hard time organizing my thoughts, in my head, never mind on screen…and typing while crying is really quite challenging!

Friday, I woke up and had a delicious shake.  Frozen black cherries, cocoa powder, and fat free yogurt, blended with a splash of milk.  Chocolate covered, cherry goodness.  I had to visit my Doctor for a far over due annual check up, and had planned on staying at a friends house overnight for some quality time.

I packed my bag, and I packed 3 portions of shake mix to get me through.  By the time I finished what I needed to at work, and got on the road for my 2 hour drive (I need to find a Doctor closer) I didn’t have time to make a shake or have a snack.  I figured since I was meeting Cherise for lunch and I’m still resisting counting calories, the lunch at our favorite Mexican place would be more than enough to replace lunch and a snack!  I really should be counting calories; I’m just worried it will become obsessive, as it often does. I had a cup of spicy bean soup, tossed greens and a pineapple, chicken and spinach quesadilla

I had a great drive and the most amazing lunch date, was feeling pretty good as I went to my Dr. Appointment.  Thankful that despite how awful things have been for me, so many others have it MUCH worse.

Life was crazy for me last fall.  I had weddings, stagegttes, changing jobs, a break up, moving, I bought a new car, and basically took the hand bag that was my life, and dumped it out on the counter.   I’m still in the process of picking up all the things, and placing them in my new life hand bag.  During all this, I missed my annual check up.  By nearly 6 months.  So in the office, My Doctor is naturally curious as to why.  I start to explain the last 6 months, and start to cry.  She keeps asking questions, and I continue to cry.  I just can’t seem to compose myself.  I’m plowing through her box of Kleenex, using up tissues in rapid succession, they are falling balled up and soggy onto the examination table like snowballs.

I am in the middle of a major meltdown, my first in weeks, and it is being witnessed by my very concerned GP.  At this point, she recommends an anti depressant.  I blink though my tears and try to suck in a breath to plead my case, I’m much better, I’m normally not such a mess… all the while I’m finding just the thought of being on anti depressants extremely depressing… Irony.  There is no shame is needing help, and if you are experiencing even the slightest thought of suicide or death, please, PLEASE seek help.  I think that meds can be a ramp to higher ground, a rainbow out of a storm.  But this is what I have you people and this blog for.  Weight loss, support and accountability, sorry if you didn’t know, I might as well throw in some mental health…

She finally lets me leave without a prescription, but I have to return in 4-6 weeks.  I have a mole that also needs to be watched, and there is no messing with melanoma, especially for a fair-haired pasty skinned girl like myself.  And a promise that if I get even a twinge of despair I must return for help.  Fair enough.

Now I have spent the last hour crying, and I haven’t even spoken to her about my healthy weight loss goals, or her recommendations.  Good thing I have to go back in a few weeks…

First place I go is for coffee.  White chocolate mocha, and I’m going to self medicate with whipping cream.  They even shave a little white chocolate on top of the whipping cream.  Oh good god… Fantastic.  Pity chocolate, as it’s obvious I’ve been crying, but I’ll take it!

As I walk back to my car I notice parallel parking blurred by tears and puffy eyes was not my thing.  The back passenger wheel is nearly on the sidewalk.  I am parked like an asshole.  At least I can laugh about that.

I never did drink my second shake.  I had slice of thin crust veggie and a piece of stuffed crust Hawaiian pizza for dinner while I watched star wars episode 3.  Obviously I should have stuck with the thin crust veggie.  Then I drank wine and ate chocolate while painting our toenails and watching a girlie movie with Candace.  It was pretty great!

I had a shake the next morning, we were meeting Vanessa for brunch but I need to eat in the morning!  (Half of a chocolate milk to go, shaken with mix.)  Lunch was a turkey sandwich with spinach salad.  Then a trip to Lulu finished our visit.

My hour drive home was thoughtful.  I had planned a night in my pajamas watching a movie and bed early, but as I pulled into the driveway I realized it was my neighbors birthday party.  I had RSVP’d weeks ago to attend.  Crap.  After a quick jaunt to fix a work problem (sometimes being the boss blows), I gathered up a bottle of wine and went over.  There was so much food…  I choose some healthier options, rice wraps, sushi, vegetables, and then offset my good choices with a couple glasses of wine.  I was glad I went, was nice to be out of my house.  Technically, under the same roof, as I only had to walk thru the garage to go there, but out of my suite none the less…  I finished my night with a cupcake.  What a weekend.  Hopefully it won’t undo the entire week of shakes and exercise.  I guess we will see on Wednesday.

Just another day…

Made a piña colada shake this morning, Greek coconut yogurt, pineapple juice and milk. Went to work, and the power was out. Sat in the dark eating beef jerky. I was craving the salt! Made it thru the day, Had a bruschetta for lunch since I hadn’t made any oatmeal today. For snacks I had a cheese string, boiled egg, fresh blueberries and my second shake. I’m waiting for my French onion soup to bake, I think I’ll make a spinach and feta salad with it. I’m doing laundry tonight… Yay laundry!

Get out and shovel!

Burn 462 calories for every hour you spend shoveling snow! And I bet the elderly couple or new mother down the street will really appreciate it! Dress warm, and make sure to drink lots of water when you are done!!